The End Is The Beginning Is The End

Captured in Koh Tao, Thailand. Captured in Koh Tao, Thailand.

Maybe you’ve heard the Smashing Pumpkins song and will get the reference in the post title. Maybe you won’t. It doesn’t really matter. But last night, I took this photograph — well, these nine photographs. And it’s one of these photos that I can’t stop looking at. The light on the left and the impending darkness on the right. The beautiful palette in-between.

I’m heading home soon. Back to Oakland, back to work, back to an America that voted for Trump. And maybe I’m the pessimist, but I think I’m going to need to look at this photo a lot in the coming years. I think things are going to get dark and ugly and frankly, I’m preparing for the worst. And I’m trying to remember that I’m not a coward, that just because I have the money to live here and wait it out doesn’t mean I should. In fact, it probably means I shouldn’t.

Sarah Kendzior says that we should write down our memories (among other things) now, because the coming years might make us forget. This photo might very well represent my good and beautiful life up until 2016. I want to hold on to it.

And the song says: Is it bright where you are 
And the song says: Have the people changed

The answer to both of those questions — now, in this moment — is a resounding N0.